Eating for Two?

Today, on this Christmas morning, I offer a warning, especially for those ladies who have mother/grandmothers like mine (the kind who think all of Life's problems can be solved by eating: "You're stomach hurts? Here, eat this," "Your head is bothering you? Try this," and "Your husband wants a divorce? Oh, honey, that's awful ... snack on this while Mommy gets her gun.") As your waistline expands and your jeans no longer fit, you will hear well-meaning friends and family tell you, "Don't worry, you're eating for two." Yes, you're tummy will grow and that's natural, but eating for two often translates to pregnant women as "eat double what you normally would." The problem with this is, as I learned tragically a few months ago, is that most babies only require about an extra 300 calories a day (more if you were underweight to begin with or exercise regularly). 300! That's like a wheat bagel and some OJ! That's a far cry from 'eating for two.'

Needless to say, most of us don't have personal trainers to whip our rears back into shape after a baby, so I'm trying my best to eat within reason. Today is Christmas, and of all difficult cirumstances, I wil be in the toughest: having lunch AND dinner with my mom and grandma. It doesn't matter how much you've eaten before Grandma sees you, if she asks you to eat something, you WILL eat something. If I refuse too much, there will be a chorus of family saying, "You're starving yourself!" Folks, you could drop me in the African savannah today, and with as much extra padding as I already have on me, I'd be fine until Valentine's.

Good luck to all those who for nine months have to limit those burgers and the like. Remember: who needs juicy, greasy, melted cheese, mustard/ketchup-dripping, and toasted bun goodness anyway?

Yeah, me too.