With the baby showers, constant attention, baby clothes, toys, and all other things baby, it's easy for MTBs to make their babies the center of their lives. I don't spite them for it, because in a way, it's natural.
I've tried my best not to bore people with baby chatter. This blog lets me get out what I want to say about my pregnancy, and let it go. Without this funnel for my banter, friends and coworkers would be ducking behind tables whispering, "Hide! The Baby Lady's coming!" Rightfully, so--who wants to hear about back aches, pelvic troubles, and acid reflux, anyway? I did tell you about my acid reflux, didn't I? Because if I haven't, let me just say--hey, where are you going?!?
No, really, this blog is therapeutic for me. As I was saying, it's easy to make a baby the center of the universe, except this: the world keeps spinning along, whether a MTB notices or not. This is why it's so upsetting for her when IT happens. Forty weeks is a long time, so we shouldn't be surprised when Life sneaks in. IT is an event, usually a traumatic one, that happens during a pregnancy, the one that makes a woman think, "Can't you all see I'm pregnant, and can't deal with this at the moment?"
Maybe IT is something as common as having to move to a new place. Maybe IT is not so mundane. The stress of having to deal with a spouse losing a job, a close friend passing away, or a car accident that threatens financial ruin reminds a mother that the baby may be the center of her universe but not the universe. The worst kind of event IT could be, in my opinion? Family. Family can make you wish you witnessed a mob hit, just so you could live solo in the witness protection program. The closer your family is, the more likely they are to cause drama.
They wait until a MTB is nice and round (completely incapable of dealing with stress and physically unable to smack others back in line) to say things like, "Your mother and I have decided to get a divorce," "Grandpa has a mistress," "Your sister got a DUI, and this one's going to court," and "Remember how I promised I'd never gamble again? Well, last Friday, I noticed you left your checkbook on the kitchen counter ..."
The sad part is, I know there's some of you out there saying, "You think that's bad? You wouldn't believe what my (fill in relative here) did! He/she (outrageous action here), and then had the nerve to (salt-in-wound action)! I didn't think I'd EVER speak to (relative's name) again, but I was forced to make nice at the very next (lame family occasion)."
When that day comes, when IT knocks on your door, future MTBs remember: Grandma Dowdel warned you.
I've tried my best not to bore people with baby chatter. This blog lets me get out what I want to say about my pregnancy, and let it go. Without this funnel for my banter, friends and coworkers would be ducking behind tables whispering, "Hide! The Baby Lady's coming!" Rightfully, so--who wants to hear about back aches, pelvic troubles, and acid reflux, anyway? I did tell you about my acid reflux, didn't I? Because if I haven't, let me just say--hey, where are you going?!?
No, really, this blog is therapeutic for me. As I was saying, it's easy to make a baby the center of the universe, except this: the world keeps spinning along, whether a MTB notices or not. This is why it's so upsetting for her when IT happens. Forty weeks is a long time, so we shouldn't be surprised when Life sneaks in. IT is an event, usually a traumatic one, that happens during a pregnancy, the one that makes a woman think, "Can't you all see I'm pregnant, and can't deal with this at the moment?"
Maybe IT is something as common as having to move to a new place. Maybe IT is not so mundane. The stress of having to deal with a spouse losing a job, a close friend passing away, or a car accident that threatens financial ruin reminds a mother that the baby may be the center of her universe but not the universe. The worst kind of event IT could be, in my opinion? Family. Family can make you wish you witnessed a mob hit, just so you could live solo in the witness protection program. The closer your family is, the more likely they are to cause drama.
They wait until a MTB is nice and round (completely incapable of dealing with stress and physically unable to smack others back in line) to say things like, "Your mother and I have decided to get a divorce," "Grandpa has a mistress," "Your sister got a DUI, and this one's going to court," and "Remember how I promised I'd never gamble again? Well, last Friday, I noticed you left your checkbook on the kitchen counter ..."
The sad part is, I know there's some of you out there saying, "You think that's bad? You wouldn't believe what my (fill in relative here) did! He/she (outrageous action here), and then had the nerve to (salt-in-wound action)! I didn't think I'd EVER speak to (relative's name) again, but I was forced to make nice at the very next (lame family occasion)."
When that day comes, when IT knocks on your door, future MTBs remember: Grandma Dowdel warned you.
No comments:
Post a Comment